The weather in Denver was freakishly warm last weekend so I dusted off my bike and took it for a spin around Golden. Getting back on the pedals after a snowy December felt great and I couldn’t have been happier. And, I discovered an added bonus – one of my favorite trail signs of all time, “Caution! Staircase Straight Ahead!”
Now, I need my millions of loyal readers to take a moment and study this
picture. It’s actually quite funny. First, look at how poor stickman is flying away from his bike. I reckon he could sail 20 or 30 yards through the air by the time he’s finished this epic tumble. Second, it looks like he must have stayed upright for a few stairs in order for the bike to gain such a pronounced downward trajectory. Finally, if the sign-makers were going to throw stickman down a long flight of stairs, couldn’t they have added a little helmet?
Maybe I have always been obsessed with bizarre signage, though. I remember the time in high school that the local Burger King had a sign on their marquee that read, “Now hiring closers.” My brilliant friends (not that I was involved) decided it would be hilarious to steal the “c” so the sign read, “Now hiring losers.” We felt like the smartest bunch of 15 year-olds ever.
So, as I wait for the next spell of warm weather, I’ll daydream about stickman’s headlong tumble and think about finding another funny sign. Maybe, I’ll ride over to stickman with a Sharpie and draw a wee helmet on his head – I bet we’ll both feel better.